When the Lord went into his garden
There before him, what he saw –
His lady Eve, all dressed in leaves
And that cocky serpent was walking tall
Having forbade this, when he surveyed this
The Lord let forth a mighty squall
And, in his rage, said – ‘Right! From now on
Everybody must crawl!’
Everybody must crawl
Everybody must crawl
It’s a fact, Jack, for one and all
Everybody must crawl!
On your back you’ll ever suffer
On your knees forever toil
And you must sing for every supper, boys
’Cause everybody must crawl!
Belshazzar he threw a party
Most immodest for his lords
The finest wines for his concubines
And the finest silver for his whores
Then all a sudden, from up above him
A hand appeared upon the wall
And the message that it scrawled
Was ‘everybody must crawl’
Everybody must crawl
Everybody must crawl
It’s a fact, Jack, for one and all
Everybody must crawl!
You’ve been weighed up and found wanting
And your kingdom is bound to fall
And you must sing for your crackerjacks, oh boy!
In other words – everybody must crawl!
If you go down to Greenwood town
Past the churchyard, and ’round the bend
You just sit tight there, and ’round midnight
There’ll come a man ’bout six-foot-ten
And when that man then puts out his hand, then
Your wish can be his one command
On one condition, you can have it all
You understand – everybody must crawl!
Yes, everybody must crawl
Everybody must crawl
It’s a fact, Jack, for one and all
Everybody must crawl!
Yes, everybody must crawl
Everybody must crawl
It’s a fact, Jack, for one and all
Everybody must crawl!
’Cause there’s a key for every door
And there’s a door for every wall
But there is one law left unbroken, boys –
Everybody must crawl!
There’s only one law left unbroken, boys –
Everybody must crawl!